Thursday, November 23, 2017

PTIJ: Perl Programming in the Torah




According to Rav xkcd (an oft quoted authority in Bam), the universe was written in perl. Since the Torah is the blueprint of creation, it follows that it must contain a Perl Programming manual. Where is it?






Answer



Other sources (alluded to in the first three panels) suggest Lisp is the language of the universe, but those must be dismissed as defaming the Creator:



How sweet are Your words to my palate,
more than honey to my mouth!
Psalm 119:103




No, the language of the universe is not spoken with a speech impediment nor does it require counting parentheses.


Hashem looked into the Torah and created the universe. Therefore, the language of the universe is the Tanakh.



Tanakh is an acronym of the first Hebrew letter of each of the Masoretic Text's three traditional subdivisions: Torah ("Teaching", also known as the Five Books of Moses), Nevi'im ("Prophets") and Ketuvim ("Writings")—hence TaNaKh.



What are those three divisions in English?



  • Prophets

  • Writings (or Readings)

  • Law



Adding a vowel we get:



PeRL



Therefore: Perl == Tanakh == the language of creation.


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